cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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