Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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