Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now

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  (248): I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now http://tfl.nu/naz7
  Replies (3) Good night (2867) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I don't think brook has ever known best

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  (360): I don't think brook has ever known best http://tfl.nu/7v0v
  Replies (18) Good night (2320) Bad night (539) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him

  (1-281): View more from Texas

  college has opened so many doors for you

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  (281): Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him (1-281): college has opened so many doors for you http://tfl.nu/e6am
  Replies (44) Good night (4386) Bad night (752)
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  (408): View more from California

  You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.

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  (408): You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job. http://tfl.nu/u3yp
  Replies (15) Good night (4245) Bad night (758) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.

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  (315): I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before. http://tfl.nu/hqeq
  Replies (23) Good night (4517) Bad night (512) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.

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  (814): Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it. http://tfl.nu/kj9q
  Replies (95) Good night (4220) Bad night (629) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you

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  (214): okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you http://tfl.nu/uhqk
  Replies (16) Good night (4418) Bad night (868) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.

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  (708): She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life. http://tfl.nu/33lt
  Replies (8) Good night (2598) Bad night (1548) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.

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  (601): If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender. http://tfl.nu/eg99
  Replies (1) Good night (1769) Bad night (623) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.

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  (734): They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you. http://tfl.nu/tuzf
  Replies (5) Good night (2214) Bad night (685)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.

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  (506): My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out. http://tfl.nu/qizv
  Replies (29) Good night (873) Bad night (1832) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.

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  (407): I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom. http://tfl.nu/s7cn
  Replies (29) Good night (3521) Bad night (647) Order T-Shirt
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch

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  (309): I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch http://tfl.nu/5u8w
  Replies (7) Good night (487) Bad night (1075) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.

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  (509): This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it. http://tfl.nu/jpqq
  Replies (4) Good night (662) Bad night (300) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.

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  (646): We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman. http://tfl.nu/a2vv
  Replies (6) Good night (186) Bad night (48) Order T-Shirt

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