So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize