i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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