Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize