it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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