I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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