I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize