How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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