Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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