Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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