He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize