How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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