I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
The beers last night were like the tears from god
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I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
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I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
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