I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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