oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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