I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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