i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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