so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
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