Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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