What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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