you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize