meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
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