She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize