I'm going to jail i love you
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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