Your tits are I can't wait for
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
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Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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