Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
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We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
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At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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