I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize