Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize