I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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