My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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