Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize