I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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