Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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