after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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