I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize