Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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