i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I wish I only lived at night.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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