halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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