I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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