Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize