this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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