just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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