I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
you never un-have a 4some
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
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