You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
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