addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
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Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
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I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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