Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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