Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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