happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
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